Always good

I know the blog has been radio silent -- it is a goal to become more consistent, but with midterms and personal stuff going on, it's been tough! 

One of those personal things was my grandparents' joint burial at Arlington National Cemetery in Washington, D.C. last week. I flew out for a whirlwind 40-hour trip, and it was really unique to see a military funeral with full honors -- it was precise, synchronized, and reverential, and my grandparents would have been very happy. 

Before the service we got to speak with my grandpa's best friend, a retired army general named Joe Ratke. He told us a lot of stories about Poppy, but a simple phrase he used to describe him was the most impactful. He talked about how Poppy was "always good." Such a simple, yet loaded sentiment when you think about how difficult it is to always be good. 

Poppy was always good at work -- we've heard from numerous colleagues how fairly he treated his subordinates, how respected he was by his colleagues, and how he always went beyond the call of duty.

It's even more impressive to be able to say that he was always good in life. It can be hard not to be selfish and to consider how our actions will affect others. It can be hard to be honest, to be respectful, to be kind, to be good. But it's so important to try. I think that's my Poppy's greatest legacy, and a legacy to which we can all aspire: to live a life in which your actions gain respect from others; in which you treat people with kindness; in which you are always good. 

(Sorry for the ghetto, unedited iPhone photos. One step at a time, ya know?)

A new resolution

I absolutely loathe the abundance of "Things I learned in my Twenties" or "10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship" articles that seem to be floating in every nook and cranny of the internet these days. However, I have a confession: I read far too many of them. There's something so tempting about having someone spell out for you what to do, what not to wear, which date to go on, etc. Most of these enlightening and profound posts are written by smug 32-year-olds who once went backpacking in India and had some transcendent experience, the retelling of which will benefit all of humankind. Reading these articles never ends well. I'll read an article by a 40-something woman that says your twenties are about career, not relationships, and begin to freak out that I'm in a serious, long-term relationship at only 26. I'll read about how I should be traveling, then one click later about how four years out of college I should be very settled in my career track. These articles that make me doubt my relationship, my choice to go back to school, my friendships, how I spend my free time....It's exhausting. 

I've become very wary of self-help, or advice from strangers, but every once in a while, in digging through all the garbage, I find gold. I think this article is perfect and, at age 90, you probably have advice that is worth listening to. 

That being said.

For lent I'm giving up meat (I had chicken jambalaya for lunch yesterday so it's really not off to a good start), but after reading yet another of these dumbass articles, I have a new resolution. The month of March is no-self-help month. No more reading this or this -- pretty much no more reading Thought Catalog at all, which is good because it's 98% terrible, anyway.  Less reading about the experiences of people I don't know, and more journaling and reflecting on my own experiences -- because these are ultimately the ones that should impact how I view my life at present, as well as the choices I make in the future.

(I think the origin of this rant is my 3-hour medieval mysticism course on Thursday evenings, in which we read medieval religious contemplatives who all claim that they have found the key to God and Heaven and perfection. We always talk about where their authority comes from, and emy classmates are slightly more diplomatic in their musings, and I really just want to be like no, but seriously, what the f*ck? So here we are.)

Teaching abroad

I am so excited to share my first interview with you guys! One of my best friends from growing up, Kelsey, recently moved to Japan to embark on a new adventure and teach English. She's only been there for six weeks, so it will be interesting to speak with her again towards the end of her year-long commitment. Here is a recap of some her initial thoughts and feelings:

What prompted the desire to teach abroad?

After working in sales for three years out of college, I started to get the itch for something completely different. Although I would not consider my time in a cubicle "soul crushing," I definitely wasn't feeling fulfilled. After coming up with a slew of odd job ideas and following through with some... I decided and made peace with the fact that I still had absolutely no clue what I want to do professionally. I did however discover that bottom line, I want to travel. Teaching is not my passion but more a means to an end.

I love that you're honest about the uncertainty.

I think people want to hear that moving to Japan was a well thought out plan bc that's a comfortable idea. It makes people feel uneasy that it doesn't have to be so hard or scary to move across the world. Anyone can do it for any reason or no reason at all. The possibility of it all scares people I think. But here I am, a gaijin in Japan and I'm doing just fine. 

Why Japan? 

I hate this question. Probably because I get it daily but mostly because I feel like my answer disappoints. No I don't like Manga or Anime, I'm not "in the know" with who's hot in JPOP (yet) and I have never studied Japanese. Japan was just a good place for me to start. The application timing, pay and especially location was right so I jumped at the opportunity. I'm living in Osaka, Japan, which is a fascinating city of almost 3 million people. Not only is it an exciting city famous for its friendly folk and indulgent food, it's known as an international travel hub.

What is your initial impression of Japanese culture in the classroom vs. the public schools you attended in the U.S.?
I teach a variety of ages from babies as young as six months old, to high schoolers, but the average age is around ten. After a month of teaching I can confidently say that students in Japan are exactly the same as students in the U.S. Maybe with the exception that they put less in their mouths. Maybe. They still act out, have short attention spans, sneeze and snot on everything, and above all, they want learning to be a fun break from their already hectic schedules. I think Japan and the U.S. are neck and neck with encouraging children to be overly involved in extra curricular activities.

What is your daily routine in Japan?

Tuesday through Saturday I work from 10:00am to 7:00pm. Before and after work I do things to explore the city casually. I walk with out direction a lot and experiment with local street food. Especially with the various Takoyaki, Okonomiyaki and ramen stands, which the Kansai region is famous for. But mostly I do the same things here as I do back home, I just struggle way more. Rarely do people speak English so every day is an interesting challenge! My weekend is more for exploring outside the city and being more of a tourist. It's typical for people my age to take the train somewhere on the weekend nights and not come back until 6:00 the next morning when the trains start up again. This Saturday night I am heading to Umeda to meet a group for dinner and nomihoudai (all you can drink) then Sunday- Monday I plan to explore Nara, a neighboring city to Kyoto. 

What about socializing? How have you been meeting people?

I have a lot of friends that I work with. I don't work with them directly because I'm the only English teacher at my school, but they are in the same program, just teaching elsewhere. I have some Japanese friends from work, going to local restaurants  and I've also joined groups on MeetUp: the Kansai Hikers Club, an entrepreneurs club, Kansai coffee and tea club, the free activities club for my area... The man who created the hiking group said that he doesn't speak very much English but when your common interest is exercise, there's not too much need for talking! There's a plan next month to hike Fuji, so hopefully I can get a day off work and go. I also signed up to host people on Couchsurfer, and in my profile I said that I plan on eating my way through Osaka. I was surprised to get messages from Japanese locals who said that they would love to explore new restaurants and work on our language skills. I had dinner last night in Umeda with a couchsurfer friend and tried fried fish female organs for the first time. 

What about romantic relationships? Do you feel any pressure to be dating someone? 

No, but I'm sure it will get lonely from time to time. For now I am prioritizing what I'm doing over forcing any relationships. I'm hoping to find someone who's like-minded and we can do all this together. 

How is the language barrier?

It's actually tougher than I thought it would be. I should have kept up with Rosetta Stone! Not many people speak English here and 99% of the people who do, are too shy to use it. So I learned Hiragana and now I'm moving on to Katakana and Kanji. I also meet with a woman and her son on Mondays for conversation class and I start group classes in April. It definitely helps that my coworkers' native tongue is Japanese! I keep hoping it will sink it all at once one day.... Ha.

Do you ever get lonely?

I only get lonely when I'm frustrated because I can't do something. The language barrier is frustrating in that it prevents me (or slows down the process) from doing simple things like opening a bank account, grocery shopping, even using my washing machine. I start to think, I wish I didn't have to try this hard, but then I realize that that's part of the fun, part of the adventure. 

Any last advice for someone thinking about teaching abroad?

Think less about it and just give it a shot. You can't figure out every detail before and you will never know if it's for you unless you try it. Even if teaching is not for you, I believe that experiencing a different culture has tremendous benefits even if only for a short while. I told myself before I left that no matter what, I'm never stuck somewhere. Keeping that mentality helps put things in perspective. 

Kobe Chinatown 

Street Takoyaki

Nightlife: At a drag bar in Umeda

At a cat cafe in Umeda

Hiking Mountain Maya in Kobe

(All pictures courtesy of Kelsey; top photo on Miya Jima Island.)